Family Talk - The Truth About My Problem Posted by Unknown | Monday, January 28

hello monday, a very dreary monday and honestly a monday I don't even want to use proper grammar. Do you ever just get really tired of doing so many things that you loose track of what your doing?  Hi, my name is Ahndea and I have a problem called "over doing." I was born with this.. and for some reason cannot STOP or SLOW DOWN! Sometimes I think because I am in such a busy season with toddler twins and basketball and gymnastics and school pick ups and projects that I have to keep running the gerbil wheel because if I stop, even for a second, I may just not get up.  As you know, I am in my 3rd week of the January Cleanse and am feeling great physically, but this week is about reflection and your soul. Actually taking the time to think... I know a novel idea right? But funny enough, it is actually one of the hardest things for me to do at this stage of my life. To think about me and what I like or don't like, goals I would like to set, dreams I may have, areas I would really like to improve on or even just what would be the best decision when faced with many.  I was known to coin the phrase "it's not about what you say, but what you ask." questions lead to answers and answers to learning.  I loved the thrill of a job interview, knowing I was entering a game of chess and the right move would get me the job at the highest pay.  The first one to speak, looses and negotiation was king! Those were the days of corporate business and client relations, the charts with goals and numbers to exceed. Money and praise and maybe a bit of pride. Fast forward 10 moves, 4 c-sections, 5 littles, relationships gained and lost, financial pressure, economic spiral, baggage increased and a whole lot less of me or margin to process and feel think about how I can slow down, deal with life, changes, pains and choices.  Kind of like being squeezed tighter but with nothing coming out, right? 

I would like to say I reflect joy and grace and wisdom and all the wonderful attributes a mother or wife or the women I have studied about throughout history. I am challenged this morning in my time of reflection to consider this verse in Luke 10:38.  I have asked myself, was martha missing an opportunity by serving and doing as mary sat and listened. Martha's intentions were pure but were they necessary? Was the doing a distraction? What is the "one" thing?  

Now as they went on their way, Jesus entered a village. And a woman named Martha welcomed him into her house. And she had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord's feet and listened to his teaching. But Martha was distracted with much serving. And she went up to him and said, “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Tell her then to help me.” But the Lord answered her, “Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her.”

Thought provoking, yet also brings a sense of peace. I have so many loves and likes and interests... is that normal?  Am I normal? I kind of liked the fact that I wasn't but sometimes find myself distracted with the entertaining or that perfect host. I can get lost in my own swarm of ideas, and not remember to listen first.  Ask first.